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There have always been a heap of names in racing - across the three codes - that are relatively meaningless to the average racegoer, yet the name clearly means something significant to the person, or persons, that are connected with the ownership of the equine or canine athlete.
A whole plethora of names have got through the supposed security cordon that is placed on naming racing stock over the years. Whilst the authorities may well try to ensure that only “wholesome” names are used, that is not always the case – and names like Richard Cranium get through the system on a reasonably regular basis. Someone in authority eventually twigged that Richard Cranium meant “Dick Head” after it had had quite a few starts, so they made them change the name, but as we are all a long time dead, most racing followers got a giggle out of it all at the time.
Then there are the catchy names like She Got The House, which infers there was not a lot of slap and tickle happening in the matrimonial home the night that particular horse got named. From my recollection of events “she” finished up a mile ahead if she did in fact get the house, as the husband’s horse was pretty ordinary.
So if you are sitting around at the end of the day and have nothing to do, as you’ve either won a fortune, or done your money, grab the Form Guide and see some of the funny names that performed around Australia on the day. I had a look back over last Saturday’s action around Australia and came up with the following.
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You wouldn’t believe the names of the two horses that dead-heated in the first race at the Gold Coast last Saturday – Haveasnip and Feeling Naughty. A mate of mine who’d recently had a vasectomy and was having a night out on the town won a stack. He needed Little Rip Snorter to run third to get the trifecta, but bugger me dead it got fourth after the photo was called for third.
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Still at the Gold Coast and Sylvia May - or she may not. I don’t know her - so I can’t comment.
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The Cruiserweight fought on too well for his opposition at $18 at the Gold Coast.
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Gundy Gal was certainly a long way from home when she rocked up at the Gold Coast last Saturday.
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Heartbroken is well named. The galloper’s owners, trainer and jockey were all shattered when it clocked in eighth Saturday night at Toowoomba.
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Heart of Dreams turned into nightmares when the gelding ran 11th of 12 at Moonee Valley. He’s thankfully been retired.
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Bliss Street hardly lived up to her name with a disgraceful ninth at the Valley.
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See The World is another well named galloper. What’s wrong with China or Thailand given he ran last to Sea Lord.
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Didntcostalot. Thank God for that - as he’s only quite limited.
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Bringing Damn Good Idea all the way from Rockhampton to Doomben was proven to be a Damn Dumb Idea after he clocked in last in the last.
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It’s all a fallacy that there’s any Warrior Within as he ran last at Doomben at 9/2.
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Cryon if you backed the aptly named gelding in the fourth at Doomben. He ran last also.
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Precedence set his namesake by actually winning a race at Moonee Valley, as he normally has an allergy to the winning post.
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Cadel’s Gold didn’t get on his bike in the opener at Moonee Valley. In fact he must have fallen off at some point as he ran second last.
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Any punter who was Upbeat about the chances of that gelding in the last at Rosehill was proven to be a dill when he clocked in twelfth of 15.
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Fast And Sexy must have surely been out on the town last Friday night. She looked like she wanted to lie down in the home straight at Rosehill, running third last at 5/1. There’s a rumour going around that she was out on the town with both Fat Al and Honourable Aussie and whilst I stress the rumours are unsubstantiated, they may well be right, as Honourable Aussie led into the straight in his race before fainting as if he was knackered - and Fat Al got knocked off when heavily backed from $4.20 to $3.60.
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Punters thought she looked hot to trot in the enclosure and there’s no disputing that Kenji Yoshida rode My Bellydancer really hard at Toowoomba, but all Kenji’s vigour couldn’t get the $2.20 chance home.
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Nitro exploded to victory at Kembla Grange last Saturday, but Thorpie needs it wetter as he ran second.
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Barney Rubble popped into Ballarat and won Race 6 at 5/1 on. Neighbours Fred and Wilma cleaned up on the totes.
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The Magic Turbo obviously failed to click in when that horse ran an ordinary fifth at Bundaberg.
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Jansonapromise. Lucky Jan. Hope everything went well after her third at Albion Park.
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The Falcon Ute is obviously in desperate need of trading in as he ran second last at Albion Park
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Splendifferous definitely wasn’t at Albion Park. He ran second last.
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Obviously Play The Line went to Valley Bingo Saturday night instead of Albion Park, as he was scratched from the latter.
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Lionsixchristiansnil. About time the Christians got off the mark isn’t it, as the score hasn’t changed for yonks?
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How come stewards allowed Offyarocka to start at Toowoomba? The crazy horse ran sixth at $1.75.
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Music Maestro most certainly didn’t have to sing for his supper Saturday night after he won at the Gold Coast.
